PDA

View Full Version : Yo Mama jokes


5.92
06-27-2001, 03:34 PM
I dont know why this shit hasnt been done before.

Yo mama is so stupid she sold her car to get gas money.

Whats up now??

ironmonkey
06-27-2001, 05:26 PM
yo mama is so stupid, she got fired from the sperm bank for drinking on the job.

yo mama is so stupid, when she jumped out the window the bitch went up.

yo mama so stupid when she asked me what kind of jeans i wore, i said "Guess" and she said "uhhhh levi's?"

haha, damn why didnt anyone post this already. good lookin, 592.

ironmonkey
06-27-2001, 05:27 PM
WHAT?!?!

BooBoo-Kitty
06-27-2001, 05:34 PM
heheheh. i love this shit.

yo mama's so ugly she gotta sneak up on a glass of water to get a drink.

yo mama's so ugly, rice crispies don't even talk to her.

yo mama's so fat, when she wears spandex it looks like she's smugglin volkswagens.

yo mama's so stupid her parents were arrested the day she was born for smugglin dope.



yeah, what f00?!?!

ironmonkey
06-27-2001, 05:42 PM
rice crispies dont even talk to her?! damn thats ugly!

06-27-2001, 05:46 PM
Your mother is so overweight, she must wear a size 34 dress.

Your mother has done so many drugs, she is now is in rehabilitation.

Your mother is so uneducated, she is now trying to better herself by attending her local community college.

Your mother is so poor, she is now on unemployment and, with the help of federal agencies, is searching for a job to get back on her feet and is on her way to becoming a more productive citizen.

Your mother is so unattractive, that she must use make-up to attract males.

Heh, I crack me up.

-----
Nullzero

ninjaKid
06-28-2001, 12:37 AM
yo momma is so ugly, her nickname is "DAMN!"

yo momma is so big she eats Wheat Thicks.

yo momma is so cross-eyed, she saw a dollar on the ground and it broke into 4 quarters.

yo momma's breath is so stank, when she breathes out her teeth duck.

yo momma's house is so small, i stuck the key in the door and stabbed 3 people.

WHAT? heheh . . . i am the master . . . of yo momma!

Decadent1
06-28-2001, 08:54 AM
Yo momma is so dumb, she got stabbed in a drive by.

dorsal one
06-28-2001, 09:09 AM
Your momma is so skinny she can hoola hoop a cheerio.

Your momma is so stoopid she got run over by a parked car.

Your momma is so small she got run over by remote control car.

falcor
06-28-2001, 10:41 AM
yo momma so nasty, when she takes of her panties it sounds like velcro.

ninjaKid
06-28-2001, 11:39 AM
Originally posted by falcor
yo momma so nasty, when she takes of her panties it sounds like velcro.

yo momma so nasty, when she takes out her TAMPON it sounds like velcro.

(had to go there)

yo momma so big she wears a VCR for a pager.

yo momma so big she plays hopscotch like "Kansas . . . *BOOM* . . . Missouri . . . *BOOM* . . . Texas . . . *BOOM*"

yo momma so big i can see her on the globe in the classroom.

yo momma's gums so black it looks like her teeth are floating.

yo momma's house is so small the front door and the back door are on the same hinge.

yo momma is so wrinkly she has to screw her hat on.

yo momma is so old you were breastfed with dust.

i've got more . . . bring it on! heheh

BooBoo-Kitty
06-28-2001, 12:29 PM
yo mama's so bald when she wears a turtleneck she looks like a busted condom.

yo mama's teeth so black she spits chocolate milk.

yo mama's so small, she could hanglide on a dorito

yo mama's so fat when she wears a malcolm X shirt helicopters try to land on her.

yo mama's so fat when she wears red kids say "hey kool-aid!" to her.



yeah bwoy!!

5.92
06-28-2001, 01:47 PM
I'm saving my snaps. I cant come out the box like everyone else. Shits funny as hell though.

Yo mama's so stupid she thought Tupac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.

Here's a father joke:
Your father's like Mounds, he's got no nuts.

cheayuh!

5.92
06-28-2001, 02:04 PM
Yo mama's so fat she got baptized at Sea World.

falcor
06-28-2001, 09:31 PM
HAHAHAHAHA!!! oh shit. right next to shamu the whale. hahahahahaha. that was funny.
ninjakid - i heard it was panties. i think they g-rated it for us kids (heard it a long time ago)

06-28-2001, 11:07 PM
Yo mama's panties are so dirty, when you throw them against the wall, they stick!

BooBoo-Kitty
06-29-2001, 07:52 AM
yo mama's crotch so dirty she don't got yeast infections, she gots moss.

Captain Cactus
06-29-2001, 11:07 AM
Yo mama's so fat when she steps on a curb she makes a driveway.

5.92
06-29-2001, 02:46 PM
Yo mama's so fat she irons her clothes on the driveway.

BooBoo-Kitty
06-29-2001, 04:15 PM
yo mama's so fat when she gets a cut she bleeds gravy.

5.92
06-29-2001, 04:59 PM
Yo mama's so stupid I told her it was chilly outside so she went and got a spoon.

I posted this in another thread but fugg it; Yo mama's so ugly she makes onions cry.

ninjaKid
06-29-2001, 07:11 PM
yo momma got a wooden afro with teflon sideburns.

yo momma got one leg, she introduced you to hip-hop.

yo momma got one foot, walk around talkin' bout "ain't . . . no . . . half . . . steppin!"

i walked into yo mommas house and stepped on a cigarette butt, and she said "who put out the heat?"

yo momma got so many missin teeth, when she smiles looks like her tongue is in jail.

yo momma is so big she walked into a restaurant, picked up the menu, looked at it and said "okay!"

i got tons, i got tons . . .

ironmonkey
07-01-2001, 09:20 AM
yo mama is so stupid, shes over here chillin with one leg trying to "kick it."

haha ninjakid got some funny ones...

Sleepy Introvert Ninja
07-01-2001, 09:45 AM
I think we owe it to the Pharcyde.

Ya mom is so fat (how fat is she?)

Ya mama is so big and fat that she can get busy
with twenty-two burritos, but times are rough
I seen her in the back of Taco Bell with handcuffs
The sad fact (what?) ya mama smokes crack (what?)
She got a burning yearning and there's no turning back
Her knuckles drag down to the ground when she walk
Spit comes out that bitch mouth when she talk

@ 92 that was goin on

5.92
07-03-2001, 02:10 PM
Yo mama's so stupid she thought a quarterback was a refund.

5.92
07-03-2001, 02:11 PM
Yo mama's so old she's got Jesus's beeper number.

XtremeAche
07-03-2001, 07:10 PM
yo mama's so fat she has to use a pillow for a tampon

jetgrl727
07-03-2001, 09:54 PM
yo mama is so fat, when she walks, her knee smiles..

" ", she got a job at magic mountain pushing the dragon swing......

yo mama is so fat, she sat on a rainbow and skittles came out....


you mama is so fat, she uses hula hoops to hold up her socks..

yo mama's like a bag of chips.. she's "frito-lay"

yo mama's head is so bald, she curls her hair with rice..

yo mama is so fat, her hairs are an inch apart..


haha i remember this from first grade...

yo mama is so fat i walked around her and i got lost..durrr.. stupid...

yo mama is so dumb, she tripped over the cordless phone..

you're mama is so short, she sits on the curb and her feet dangle..

yo mama is so small she poses for tophies....

i dunno i could go on and on.....and on.....




[Edited by jetgrl727 on 07-03-2001 at 11:02 PM]

ninjaKid
07-04-2001, 12:20 AM
ooooh i cannot lose!

yo momma is so bald i can see her thoughts.

yo momma got no arms, on wheel of fortune kickin the wheel screamin' "BIG MONEY! BIIIG MONEY!"

yo momma so dumb she shot an arrow into the air and missed.

yo momma so old she sweats dust.

yo momma's gums so black when she smiles it looks like her teeth are floating. (did i use that one already?)

yo momma's feet so hard and callused when she walks on hardwood floors sounds like she tapdancin'.

yo momma got leprosy, talkin' bout "don't make me drop the elbow on you!"

yo momma's lips so big she uses chap-stick spray.

yo momma is so poor she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken and licks OTHER PEOPLE'S FINGERS. (can't believe no one said that one yet)

yo momma got no thumbs and went insane tryin' to snap her fingers.

oooh, it's 4am, and not eternal either. time for bed!

. . . where's yo momma?

-ad

5.92
07-04-2001, 07:04 AM
If ugliness were bricks, yo mama would have her own projects.

5.92
07-04-2001, 07:07 AM
Yo mama's eyebrows are so big cockroaches skydive off them.
duh

jetgrl727
07-05-2001, 10:40 PM
yo mama is so ugly she made stevie wonder do a double take

yo mama's glasses are so thick, she could look into the future

yo mama is so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio...

haha whatever i'm just spittin' old ass shit... it's just too funny to ferget ..but i must admit ninjakids got the competition. hella funny

jetgrl727
07-05-2001, 10:47 PM
she so old, she drove a chariot to school.. remember that one?

jetgrl727
07-05-2001, 10:49 PM
Originally posted by 5.92
Yo mama's eyebrows are so big cockroaches skydive off them.
duh


uhh.. okay i'm sorry ... but not as sorry as that one..^

jetgrl727
07-05-2001, 10:51 PM
yo mama is so ghetto, her air-con is louder than her t.v.... and she got foil up on the antenas

[Edited by jetgrl727 on 07-05-2001 at 11:54 PM]

BooBoo-Kitty
07-06-2001, 08:19 AM
yo mamma's so ghetto her roaches got roaches

yo mamma's so dark if she smiled in the dark people would think it was the cheshire cat

yo mamma's teef so yellow when she smiles traffic slows down

yo mamma's nose is so crooked she walks with a limp




sorry. but its kinda early out here and these are the best i could do.

empanadamn
07-06-2001, 01:55 PM
yo' momma got one leg, talkin about, "let's kick it."

________
gm le8 engine specifications (http://www.chevy-wiki.com/wiki/GM_LE8_engine)

jetgrl727
07-06-2001, 06:02 PM
yo mama is like a shot gun. one cock and she blows.

yo mama is like a door knob. everyone gets a turn...

yeh yeh i know i suck..but so does...YO MAMA puah ha ha
i dunno im just being nasty but so is... ehh..

5.92
07-08-2001, 10:39 AM
Yo mama's so dark when she gets in the car the oil light comes on.
Yo mamas so black she leaves fingerprints on charcoal.

5.92
07-12-2001, 11:26 AM
Originally posted by jetgrl727
yo mama is so ghetto, her air-con is louder than her t.v.... and she got foil up on the antenas

[Edited by jetgrl727 on 07-05-2001 at 11:54 PM]
You diss my shit then come back with that one?

Yo mama's so fat she stepped on a penny and a booger came out of Lincoln's nose.
Zoinks that one sucked too.
peace

GEKIGANGER 3
07-13-2001, 03:07 AM
man, i remember Uptown Comedy Club had a segment for snaps. who remembers that?? that shit was LIVe!!



but anyways, back to the business at hand:


yo mama's so stupid she thought masturbation was a karate teacher

yo mama so ugly, she went into a haunted house and came out with an application

yo mama so nasty, i had phone sex with her and the bitch gave me an ear infection

yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping




remember In Living Color with the Wheel of Dozens?

"yo mama so good at math..."

"yo mama is so beautiful..."

"yo mama is so hard to buy shoes for..."

WORD!!

ninjaKid
07-13-2001, 05:25 PM
daaaaymn! okay okay

yo momma is so black when she eats tootsie rolls she has to wear white gloves so she don't bite her fingers off.

(alternate version - your momma so white, white rabbit candies, etc.)

yo momma got a mouth on the back of her neck, you think she's noddin' "what's up" but she just chewin'.

yo momma got a mouth under each arm, when she chew it looks like she's doin the cabbage patch.

yo momma so nasty she has to sneak up on bathwater. (did someone say that?)

yo momma so poor, ya'll got a wooden playstation 2 for christmas.

yo momma's nostrils so big, she got Neanderthals livin' up in there. (that was dumb i know)

yo momma is so fat when her pager goes off people scream "WATCH OUT, THE BITCH BACKIN' UP!"

yo momma is so dumb i told her to get dim sum and she said "get WHO some?"

yo momma is so dumb i told her i was gonna do the tinikling and she told me to be sure and put the seat down after i was done.

yo momma is so dumb i told her i was going to get pho and she told me to use a condom.

aaaaargh

-ad

GEKIGANGER 3
07-14-2001, 04:01 PM
yo mama nostrils so big she can pick her nose with boxing gloves on

5.92
07-16-2001, 05:42 PM
Yo mama's so old she was fishing on the other side of the Red sea when Moses parted it.

GEKIGANGER 3
07-16-2001, 06:50 PM
yo mama so old jesus signed her yearbook

kamenriderv3
07-16-2001, 11:45 PM
Ivy League snap

Your mother so poor her short term investments fell below 5 million. And that was before the market dropped!!!

diesel_boy
07-20-2001, 01:04 PM
Yo mama is so fat that when she sat on a rainbow, skittles came down.

Yo mama is so short that she plays handball against the curb of the sidewalk.

Yo mama is so fat that when she broke her leg, gravy poured out.

5.92
07-21-2001, 06:32 AM
Yo mama's so nasty she pours ice down her panties to keep the crabs fresh.

5.92
07-21-2001, 06:33 AM
Yo mama's teeth are so brown cuz she brushes her teeth with a snickers bar.
duhhh..I know.

5.92
07-21-2001, 05:46 PM
Yo mama's breath smell so bad toothbrushes are leaning to the side going, "Dont pick me!"

kobo
07-21-2001, 09:24 PM
stop it you guys, stop talkin about my mom, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......

ok I'll try

your moma is so stupid, she puts the peanut butter on the wrong side of the bread.

5.92
07-22-2001, 07:11 AM
Yo mama's so stupid she told me to meet her on the corner of Walk and Dont Walk.

jen_er_ator
07-22-2001, 08:29 AM
ya mama's so ugly, she ain't balding, it's just her hair tryin to make a run for it.

5.92
07-22-2001, 08:32 AM
Yo mama's so short she's gotta look up to see down.

BooBoo-Kitty
07-22-2001, 10:29 AM
yo mama's so dumb she thought a quarterback was a refund (used already?)

yo mama's so dumb she took a blood test and flunked

yo mama's so poor she got frenchfries on layaway

yo mama's so poor, she'll eat kentuckyfriedchicken one night and lick her fingers the next



sorry for reusing. i just wanted to be cool.

GEKIGANGER 3
07-23-2001, 06:47 PM
yo mama's so short, she can sit on a dime and her legs hang off the side.

5.92
07-23-2001, 06:50 PM
Yo mama's so old she drove chariots to school.

GEKIGANGER 3
07-23-2001, 06:55 PM
yo mama so short, her feet show on her driver's license.

5.92
07-23-2001, 07:01 PM
Yo mama's so black she sweats coffee

ninjaKid
07-23-2001, 08:12 PM
yo momma so black she walks outside at noon and the street lights come on.

yo momma so yellow she sweats butter. (hey, turnabout is fair play, no?)

yo momma so ugly, i pushed her face in some dough to make gorilla cookies. (thank you Fred Sanford)

yo momma's hair so short she rolls it up with rice.

yo momma got a plexiglass afro with polyurethane sideburns.

ya moms asked me what kind of jeans i was wearin. i said "Guess." she says "Bugle Boy?"

yo MOMMA!

07-23-2001, 10:32 PM
Yo mama wears combat boots.

5.92
07-24-2001, 10:58 AM
Yo mama's so fat her tits are like 2 sticks of butter

5.92
07-24-2001, 11:06 AM
Yo mama's missing toes and shit. Whenever she tries to kick me it looks like she 's sayin 'peace'.

peace(with my hand)

GEKIGANGER 3
07-25-2001, 11:42 AM
yo mama so fat the back of her neck look like a package of hot dogs.

5.92
07-26-2001, 02:16 PM
Yo mama's so greasy she uses bacon strips for band aids.

GEKIGANGER 3
07-28-2001, 01:23 PM
yo mama so fat her blood type is Ragu.

5.92
07-28-2001, 07:57 PM
Yo mama's head so big the adjustable snaps on the back of her baseball hat look at each other and say,"Oh no!"

5.92
07-28-2001, 08:58 PM
Yo mama's so fat she's taller lying down.

Tetsuo Shima
07-29-2001, 11:36 AM
5.92--you're a fuckin' masterpiece and a half.
Nullzero and colleaguez--what bus did you fall off from?

ninjaKid
07-30-2001, 07:17 AM
yo momma puts on her pants 4 legs at a time.

enjoisey
07-31-2001, 09:35 AM
please forgive if any of these have been said.....but...

...yo momma so fat, when the bitch go to the beach people try to push her back in the water.

...yo momma so dumb, she think taco-bell is a mexican phone company.


...yo momma so ugly, when she come in the room, mice jump on the tables.

and finally,

...yo momma soooo stooopid, it take the bitch 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.

5.92
08-02-2001, 02:33 PM
fresh fresh fresh!

enjoisey
08-02-2001, 02:44 PM
shit i can go on for days:

...yo momma so fat, she got her own zip code.

...yo momma so fat, the weigh her ass on the richter scale.

....yo momma so fat, she can roll over 4 quaters and make a dollar.

...yo momma so fat, the circus called and asked to borrow her dress for a big top.

...yo momma so fat, when she goes to the beach, she's the only one to get a tan.

damn, that bitch is fat.

5.92
08-02-2001, 03:20 PM
There's some repeaters in there but the big top one was
freshfreshfresh!

08-02-2001, 03:21 PM
Yo' mama so fat...

She gotta iron her clothes in the street.

AfroKen.com

ninjaKid
08-02-2001, 04:28 PM
yo momma so fat she stepped into the bowling alley and got strikes on all the lanes at once.

yo momma so ugly she made the Mona Lisa frown.

yo momma's breath is so stank it makes onions cry. (that's old)

yo momma got dreadlocks in her armpits.

yo momma so fat last time she saw 90210 was on the scale.

yo momma so fat she got on one of them talking scales and it said "one at a time, please."

yo momma's feet so crusty when she walks on a hardwood floor it sound like the bitch tapdancin.

yo momma so skinny she swallowed a popcorn kernel and she thought she was pregnant.

etokle
08-02-2001, 04:30 PM
Yo mama's so fat after sex she smokes a turkey.

I heard yo mama got arrested for smuggling drugs - they told her to bend over and found 100 pounds of crack.

08-03-2001, 07:50 AM
Yo mama so stupid...
...She got hit by a bus and asked for a transfer...

08-06-2001, 03:17 PM
Yo mama is so stupid,

I told her to blow up a car and she burnt her lips on the exhaust pipe...

Yo Mama so stupid,

Ripley wouldn't believe it.

5.92
08-06-2001, 08:57 PM
Yo mama's so old she knew Captain Crunch when he was a private.

GEKIGANGER 3
08-07-2001, 04:59 PM
yo family so black your photo albums look like a bunch of negatives.

ninjaKid
04-11-2002, 12:33 AM
yo mama is so stupid she cooks with Old Spice.

-ad

SexualWasabi
07-11-2003, 02:24 PM
Yo mama so big when she jumped up she got stuck!

Yo mama so fat, she stepped on a dollar and made change!

Yo mama so tall she did a back flip and kicked God in the mouth!

DJ LunchBox
07-11-2003, 04:24 PM
yo mama so stupid she stole a car and kept up the payments!

Yo mama so stupid, she got hooked on phonics.

Yo mama so fat they call her MAC cuz she built like a truck.

Yo mama so fat she don't take pictures she takes posters!

DJ LunchBox
07-11-2003, 04:35 PM
Yo mama so nasty she got more crabs than Red Lobster!

Yo mom is so stupid she got stabbed in a driveway!

Yo mom's teeth so yellow she spits butter!

You so ugly your mom fed you with a slingshot!

You so ugly, when you were born the doctor slapped yo mama!

Who want some!?!?!

5.92
07-11-2003, 04:44 PM
Originally posted by GEKIGANGER 3
yo family so black your photo albums look like a bunch of negatives.


Your family's so black when they get in the car the oil light comes on.

DJ LunchBox
07-11-2003, 04:48 PM
BIRFDAY BOY!!!!!


what up negro!!!

where you at?

you best call me if you in LA holmes!!

Alex
07-11-2003, 05:00 PM
Your momma's so fat, when she dances the band skips...

Your momma's so old, she reads the bible and reminisces...

Your momma's so black, when she's cut, she don't bleed, she smoke...

Alex
07-11-2003, 05:06 PM
your momma's house so small, I walked in the front door and fell out the back!!

I can't stop myself....

key_loser
07-11-2003, 07:31 PM
"i can't stop myself"

that's what yo mamma said

kingka
07-12-2003, 08:56 PM
your mom is ugly...

key_loser
07-12-2003, 09:28 PM
but only half as ugly as YOURS!

OOOOOOH

ninjaKid
07-14-2003, 07:20 PM
yo momma so ugly, Osama Bin Laden is hidin from HER. not the USA.

yo momma got 8 legs and they call her "octopussy".

yo momma looks like Tetsuo at the end of Akira.

yo momma's teeth are so yellow, she marks "Asian" on the census form, even though she so black she glows in the dark.

-ad

5.92
08-26-2004, 01:14 PM
Yo mama so fat when she stands on the corner, cops drive by and yell, "Break it up!!".

empanadamn
08-26-2004, 02:23 PM
yo mama so thick she don't wear daisy dukes,
she wear boss hoggs
________
buy vaporizers (http://vaporizers.net/)

lakebottom
08-26-2004, 04:08 PM
yo mama is so fat, she uses a shovel for a spoon and one of those big metal bowls that Korean moms use to make kimchee as her bowl.

lakebottom
08-26-2004, 04:13 PM
you're mama is such a manly prostitute that she is her own pimp, and she's so stupid she slaps herself when herself doesn't pay up, and she's so poor she always slaps herself since herself can't pay up. stupid bitch.

lakebottom
08-26-2004, 04:14 PM
yo mama is so black that the evening is jealous of her dark hue.

stinky
08-26-2004, 04:56 PM
Yo mama is so special she got her own olympics!

5.92
04-22-2005, 01:12 PM
Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

Yo mama so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

golivar
04-22-2005, 01:16 PM
yo mama's so fat she uses a VCR as a beeper

yo mama's so fat her blood type is Ragu








http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/golivar/randoms/ohsnap.gif

35ft6
04-22-2005, 01:17 PM
Yo mamma is such a fucking cunt that she has no female friends.

golivar
04-22-2005, 01:19 PM
yo mama's so stupid it took her an inordinate amount of time to complete her SATs

Hap
04-22-2005, 01:20 PM
Originally posted by golivar
yo mama's so stupid it took her an inordinate amount of time to complete her SATs
LOLOLOLOLOL!

35ft6
04-22-2005, 01:27 PM
Yo mamma is so ugly that she took cooking classes because she realized that based on looks alone it would be difficult to get a man interested in her enough to propose marriage.

35ft6
04-22-2005, 01:28 PM
Yo mamma is so short that in high school she played point guard on the girl's basketball team even though she tried out for center.

5.92
04-22-2005, 03:03 PM
Yo mama so nasty she made right guard turn left.

Pollux
04-22-2005, 03:22 PM
..."Bitch? Who you callin' a bitch? Your mama's a sorry bicth"
..."Yo, my mama ain't no bitch!"
-House Party

5.92
04-22-2005, 03:25 PM
^it's 'ain't' brah\m/

5.92
04-22-2005, 03:27 PM
Yo mama's so stank she made Speed Stick slow down.










byyyyyyyyyy mennen!

Pollux
04-22-2005, 03:28 PM
Originally posted by 5.92
^it's 'ain't' brah\m/
myyyyy baaaaaaaad braaaahhhh....

randall fairbrook
04-22-2005, 04:07 PM
yo momma's so tall 'n lanky that she did a backflip and kicked jesus in the teeth




yo mommma is so old that she used to do drive by's on a donkey with moses



yo momma is so stupid she got stabbed in a drive by

Pollux
04-22-2005, 05:02 PM
Your mama's so fat, she fell over and broke her leg, and gravy fell out.

5.92
04-22-2005, 10:27 PM
Check the other pages before you start to play folks...
Youre repeatin shit...

Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.

00447447
04-22-2005, 10:29 PM
Your mother is so morbidly obese that the air-line attendant suggested that she purchase two seats.

5.92
04-22-2005, 10:31 PM
Originally posted by Pollux

myyyyy baaaaaaaad braaaahhhh....
:D

35ft6
04-22-2005, 11:02 PM
Yo mamma is so stupid she took an umbrella to see Memento.

35ft6
04-22-2005, 11:03 PM
Yo mamma eats so much that she's overweight.

randall fairbrook
04-22-2005, 11:07 PM
yo momma got 2 arms and two legs and a vagina and two ears and she enjoys a good breakfast

00447447
04-22-2005, 11:08 PM
Originally posted by randall fairbrook
yo momma got 2 arms and two legs and a vagina and two ears and she enjoys a good breakfast

you've crossed the line!

randall fairbrook
04-22-2005, 11:12 PM
http://images.art.com/images/PRODUCTS/Regular/10111000/10111682.jpg

i walk the line

randall fairbrook
04-22-2005, 11:14 PM
your mother enjoys a tall glass of iced tea from time to time





OH SNAP!

golivar
04-22-2005, 11:26 PM
yo mama's so black, it may be due to a high concentration of melanin in her skin

00447447
04-22-2005, 11:27 PM
your mother cares for you and works hard to ensure your well-being!

BRING IT!

golivar
04-22-2005, 11:33 PM
yo mama's so poor, she comes from an economically disadvantaged family which for generations has resided in a city which was once a flourishing center of the textile industry but now suffers from "urban blight" due to manufacturers moving production facilities to third world countries in search of cheaper labor and lower tariffs.

randall fairbrook
04-22-2005, 11:36 PM
that's some shit right there!

golivar
04-22-2005, 11:38 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/golivar/randoms/40885ddb00053.jpg

35ft6
04-22-2005, 11:53 PM
Don't make me search for my classic yo mamma jokes. Don't make me.

00447447
04-22-2005, 11:57 PM
Originally posted by 35ft6
Don't make me search for my classic yo mamma jokes. Don't make me.

I don't see any alternatives

35ft6
04-23-2005, 12:05 AM
Originally posted by 00447447


I don't see any alternatives Nor do I...Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama is so poor that recently when she was filling out an online questionnaire she had to check the box next to the numbers indicating she was in the lowest income bracket available. Snap! Originally posted by 35ft6
I'm staying up to see who wins the Roddick, Safin match. It's sickening.

edit: Yo mama is so poor that when I looked through the Richest Americans issue of Forbes magazine I didn't see her mentioned even once! Ooooh, snap! Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama is so broke that she often finds herself unable to afford certain items due to being short of funds. Damn! Snap, son!!! Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama is so stupid that when she's asked a question, especially ones regarding quantum theory, more times than not she's unable to offer a cogent response.

Yo mama is so fat that concerned friends and family members will often lovingly tell her that she should consider going on a diet and implementing an exercise routine because they're concerned about the long term health ramifications of her relatively sedentary lifestyle.

Yo mama is so poor that she clips coupons in order to save money when she's at the grocery store buying essential food items for your family.

Please dry your tears. I know my put downs are the best, but no need to take them so seriously. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama didn't even complete a semester of community college, let alone earn an MBA, talkin' 'bout how she's taking care of business... Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama is sooo stupid she thinks the capital of Germany is Berlin.

Yo mama is sooo ugly that she had to develop a really great personality in order to attract potential mates.

Yo mama is sooo short that she never ended up becoming a high fashion model on account of being 3 inches shy of 5 feet 9 inches tall, even though everybody agreed she was certainly pretty enough, and instead had to settle for doing print work.

Yo mama's head's sooo small that she has to custom order baseball caps from a place out in Nebraska that specializes in crafting hats for people with smaller than average head dimensions. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama loves collecting commemorative plates soooo much that your dad bought her one for Christmas. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo momma's so old that she remembers when a hamburger cost a nickel. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama's so fat that her panties are comically oversized. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama is so special that everybody agrees that there's nobody else in town that's quite like her. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo momma is so black that there's no way in a million years she could pass for caucasian. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama's so stupid that when she overheard some strangers talking about the "Mars Rover" she thought it entailed sending a labrador retriever on a space expedition. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama's so stupid that when she overheard some strangers talking about the "Mars Rover" she thought it entailed sending a labrador retriever on a space expedition. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama's so black that it's hard to imagine that there's anybody out there darker than her. Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mama's so stupid that she thinks euthanasia is a boy scout troop in Cambodia.

Yo mama's such a bad cook that when your dad tells her "dinner was good" he's usually lying.

Yo mama's sooo hairy that if she were a man she would still be considered hairy, but not as hairy.

00447447
04-23-2005, 12:14 AM
consider yourselves SERVED

golivar
04-23-2005, 12:22 AM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v701/golivar/randoms/ohsnap.gif

Pollux
04-23-2005, 12:01 PM
Your mama's so dumb, I'm smarter than her.

beanie
04-23-2005, 12:07 PM
yo momma is so stupid she is incompotent.

5.92
04-23-2005, 03:36 PM
incompetent

beanie
04-23-2005, 04:12 PM
i stand corrected.

angoraphobia
04-23-2005, 04:12 PM
yo mama is so retahded that she takes the short bus to the grocery store? its really the best i can do.....sadly....

beanie
04-23-2005, 04:15 PM
yo momma's so bald, when she puts on a turtle neck sweater, she looks like a busted condom.

5.92
04-23-2005, 04:19 PM
Originally posted by beanie
i thought it was that, but then I sorta thought it over and was like...potent...incom...incompotent...and then you...no...wrong.
:heart:
I'm sorry bruh. I was really good at spelling as a kid so I would proofread peoples shit all the time. Correcting others spelling is a bad habit for me.

Your an 18 year old whiz kid and I'm a 32 year old living in a warehouse correcting people's spelling online. I lose, trust me:rolleyes:

Ang - Your shit was good but you live in Oakland now....gotta brush up on those snapsssss...;)

5.92
04-23-2005, 04:20 PM
Yo mama's so fat she's taller lying down.

beanie
04-23-2005, 04:23 PM
Originally posted by 5.92

:heart:
I'm sorry bruh. I was really good at spelling as a kid so I would proofread peoples shit all the time. Correcting others spelling is a bad habit for me.

Your an 18 year old whiz kid and I'm a 32 year old living in a warehouse correcting people's spelling online. I lose, trust me:rolleyes:

Ang - Your shit was good but live in Oakland now....gotta brush up on those snapsssss...;)

hugs to the decimal!!!!!

don't put yourself down, it brings about wrinkles.

5.92
04-23-2005, 04:28 PM
awww....

It's all good. I love where I'm at in my life. You act very mature for your age (God that sounded old).
You got your head screwed on tight.
[burgess meredith]Youre gonna go far kid[/burgess meredith]

beanie
04-23-2005, 04:30 PM
i think thats why I'm at a place I don't like...nice to hear something like that though :) :heart::hugs:

ok

yo momma is so stupid, she used napkins to wipe her ass, and TP to wipe her face!!!!

5.92
04-23-2005, 04:31 PM
nice!

35ft6
04-23-2005, 04:50 PM
Yo mamma is so retarded that she's been diagnosed with down's syndrome.

5.92
04-23-2005, 05:28 PM
http://www.tangmonkey.com/columns/images/thumbdown.jpg

35ft6
04-23-2005, 06:44 PM
Yo mamma's thumbs down is so pathetic that Roger Ebert kicked her in the nuts.

35ft6
04-23-2005, 07:02 PM
Yo mamma is such a loving, caring mother that every year her children fly in from all over the United States to celebrate the day of her birth.

angoraphobia
04-23-2005, 07:14 PM
Originally posted by 5.92

Ang - Your shit was good but live in Oakland now....gotta brush up on those snapsssss...;)

seriously.....and that was after i spent some time on the streets!

5.92
04-23-2005, 09:57 PM
Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mamma's thumbs down is so pathetic that Roger Ebert kicked her in the nuts.
http://www.campnewhopemn.org/images/thumbs-up_lg.jpg

syon
04-24-2005, 10:45 AM
your momma's so fat...
shut up mom.

Margin Walker
04-24-2005, 05:47 PM
(I apologize in advance for the lack of political corectness in this joke, but here goes.....)

"Yo Mama's so fat, she got more Chins than a Chinese phonebook!"

FDM
04-24-2005, 07:55 PM
yo mama ain't got no neck, and we call her head & shoulders

35ft6
04-24-2005, 10:07 PM
Yo mamma is so stupid it takes her 60 seconds to make Minute Rice.

beanie
04-24-2005, 10:15 PM
yo momma is so fat, she has barnacles

yo momma is so hungry, she could eat a horse.

yo momma is so ugly, when she was born the doctor slapped both her parents.

yo momma is so poor she can't afford to pay attention.

yo momma is so fat, her nickname is dayum!

yo momma is so fat, she eats wheat thicks.

yo momma is so dense, she invented a wheelchair with pedals.

golivar
04-24-2005, 10:17 PM
Originally posted by 35ft6
Yo mamma is so stupid it takes her 60 seconds to make Minute Rice.

uh..hello?!

60 seconds IS one minute!


DUMBASS!!!11

35ft6
04-24-2005, 10:57 PM
Yo mamma is so stupid she invented a casket with a DVD player inside.

Yo mamma is so stupid that she opened up a snow blower shop in Saudi Arabia.

Yo mamma is so stupid that she thinks Golivar is a conversion table for time.

00447447
04-24-2005, 11:02 PM
http://vicki.bigthicketdirectory.net/images/mama1.jpg

5.92
04-25-2005, 01:40 PM
Originally posted by 5.92
Check the other pages before you start to play folks...
Youre repeatin shit...

Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.

randall fairbrook
04-25-2005, 04:16 PM
yo momma got no arms, talkin' bout how she gonna throw a block party

fightgenie
04-26-2005, 12:29 AM
Originally posted by 5.92

http://www.campnewhopemn.org/images/thumbs-up_lg.jpg
Yeah, a moustache’ll fix that face.

taky
07-13-2005, 11:21 AM
everyone knows the
"can we get off moms cause i just got off yours"
i like the response
"shit i had to roll over 3 times to get off your mom" :D

axelhoney
07-13-2005, 08:38 PM
yo mama is so fat when she walks her ass looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.

5.92
07-13-2005, 09:41 PM
^nice!

ninjaKid
12-04-2006, 07:01 AM
ok, i have an audition for "yo momma" (the MTV show, not yo actual momma") at 1 . . . gimme your best!!!

FDM
12-04-2006, 08:15 AM
yo mama so slutty, her favorite chap stick flavor is dick.

woojoemao
12-04-2006, 08:29 AM
Yo momma is so nice that she let you get that puppy you really wanted and even took care of it when you were too busy playing with your friends.

ninjaKid
12-04-2006, 09:59 AM
i guess i'm just too old to be on yo momma . . . i DESTROYED these 2 kids, but the dude running it took me to the side and told me that while my jokes were way better, they had this target demographic . . . my only chance is if his boss sees my tape and decides that i can come off younger . . . which i can . . . so cross yo fingers!

and yo MOMMA'S fingers!

yamchild
12-04-2006, 10:02 AM
you're just saying that cos yo' mama's so fat, she can't even cross her fingers.

good luck!

FDM
12-04-2006, 10:33 AM
Originally posted by ninjaKid
i guess i'm just too old to be on yo momma . . . i DESTROYED these 2 kids, but the dude running it took me to the side and told me that while my jokes were way better, they had this target demographic . . . my only chance is if his boss sees my tape and decides that i can come off younger . . . which i can . . . so cross yo fingers!

and yo MOMMA'S fingers!

all i can imagine is like, the dodgeball scene from billy madison, with "beat on the brat" playing in the background, and ninja's just wailing on these kids and making them cry. hahaha :D

evillilgirl
10-25-2007, 08:57 AM
yo mama sooooooooooooooo fat
jabba the hut said dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyuuuuuummmmmmmm.

(had to give up for robot chicken, cause i dislike that show but this made me giggle)